(Go on Jack. Make us happy. Make your fans happy.)
Welcome to Death Watch! Only the baddest of the baddest motha fuckas come out alive in this game of death and violence! And I am your master of decapitations, the Bishop of Blood and Carnage! The Black Baron! So whats it gonna be Kill Seeker? You gonna take a bat and send some mo-fo’s into the bulls eye of a dart board?! Or take a bottle of bud and shake it nice and fast and go sending some punks sorry ass into a giant spike?! Maybe you prefer to be a little bit more creative! And instead you put a tire over the poor asshole, then stab a caution sign right through his head, and finish off the mother fucker by throwing him into a wall of spikes a la Rose Bush! Hell yeah pimps and players let’s start it and all you got to worry about is hitting it and quitin it! Ya feel me!
As you can already tell. I love MadWorld. I loved it so much that I impersonated as the Black Baron for a few seconds there. It would of worked if I didn’t run out of things of what the Black Baron would say. Okay enough about how much I love it, let’s see if this game can make you love it!
(I’m gonna rip your mother fucking balls off!)
Put the kids to bed, lock your doors, make sure your profanity hating mother isn’t coming over, and make sure you have enough tissues to clean up the mess when you’re done with this game. House of the Dead is back, and holy shit it is packing more heat than the 4 other HotD titles! Overkill is the face lift that the series needed, and it didn’t just get a face lift! It completely changed what HotD was! So who here is ready for some Zombie infested, gritty, oldschool, grind house gameplay?
Anyway, House of the Dead: Overkill was created by Headstrong games, a British gaming company who had a die hard obsession with the HotD games. SEGA gave the HotD title to Headstrong and on February 2009, everyone got a piece of what Headstrong games could do with zombies, chicks, profanity, and guns.
What can I say about the Legend of Zelda that hasn’t been said before? The series has very rarely ever let me down. Every Zelda title I have ever purchased has at least lived up to it’s price. The series has helped inspire and just hands down elevate the world of video games. From kids dressing up as Link for Halloween to those nerdy mutha fuckas babbling about it’s genius design or it’s “bah bah bad ovverratted gaynezz”, the Legend of Zelda is quite the uhhhh….legend (laugh).
With all of that said, the Legend of Zelda rarely departs from it’s formula. The series manages to keep itself somewhat fresh with each new installment with updated graphics and gameplay mechanics (Ex. “Wow mom, I can finally swing a sword pressing the A button on horseback. I mean, using a bow with a C button was neato, but this is totally well, gollyriffic.”). I’m not saying this is horrible, at least Nintendo tries to change up a few things up. Essentially though, we are all just playing the same game over and over. Then again, that is why most of us have stuck to the series.
(are we dying, grandpa?)
Man, its been forever since I last did my TNPLH review of Still Alive for the DS, but I felt it was time to dust it off and give you all a treat.
For those of you who were alive when the Legend of Zelda II first came out for the NES, you were a little disappointed and confused. It wasn’t the now classic bird’s eye viewpoint, the gameplay was more arcade like and the difficulty was ridiculous. Its not to say that as a stand alone game, it wasn’t a great game. But as a sequel, I felt it personally fell short of the original.
But let’s pretend it hadn’t been released for the NES, but instead was released for the SNES. Avid homebrew creator, Konjak has done just that by creating a very Zelda II like game but with stunning graphics, terrific music and some of the best fast pace, arcade action since Gunstar Heroes. The game makes no hiding the fact that its a blantant rip-off of Zelda (I mean, its name is Legend of Princess), and it protects itself hilariously by giving the main character pink hair, parodying his victory stance with his sword and best of all, orchestrating a completely “original” musical score which obviously borrows certain melodies from the Zelda franchise.
( MORE ZOMBIES! I SAID MORE DAMN IT! )
Just in case 08′ didn’t give you enough zombies or un-dead creatures to slaughter, Capcom is here to help that urge. While RE5 isn’t going to be out until around Spring, Dead Risings “Chop Till You Drop” will be coming to the Wii in February. Just so you know this Dead Rising is a re-make of the original 360 title, adding Wii controls and some extra goodies as well. So to hype the release of the game, Capcom has gone into great lengths to make a J-Rock music video for the game. Now watch as all of Dead Rising’s characters and zombies bang their heads and beat each other sensless!
By The Bastard Gamer
(How do animals learn? Well as long as they learn to taste good I don’t really care!)
Well, Peta is at it again. This time with a new flash game where they stretch the truth about Thanksgiving. I thought I’d play their little Cooking Mama ripoff game to see what they feel about one of my favourite holidays.
(Is very impressed.)
Supracress was kind enough to share his nursery with us over at The Game Heroes, and I felt I should share it with everyone else out there on the Internet. How cool is this?!
Aww, look at baby Wario. This guy’s kid is obviously going to grow up to be a criminal. Continue reading