Outpatient Article: Under The Knife – Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved 2 (Xbox 360)

doogmahBy Doogmah

(No game should ever cost 1,600 MP.)

Under The Knife

Ever since I bought the original Geometry Wars, i’ve been hooked. On a normal day, i’ll wake up, turn on my 360 and start blasting the crap out of neon polygons. Well, a few days ago I went on my every-so-often look around the Live Arcade to find out that a sequel had been made, and I didn’t have it. Making a decision that would in most cases bite me in the ass as soon as I played the game, I charged 1,000 MP to my card (even though it’s only 800.. *shakes fist*) and bought it before I even tried out the demo. Thankfully, what I got was basically what a sequel should be; An improvement on the gameplay, and lots of new stuff to do. The price jump from 400 to 800 MP is justified considering the 6 different modes to unlock (including the standard mode from GWE) and a multiplayer mode which allows both cooperative and competitive play.

! Continue reading

Outpatient Article: Under The Knife – Castlevania: Aria Of Sorrow (GBA)

DoogmahBy Doogmah
(No batteries for 360 controllers? Fuck. *Dusts off GBA*)

Under The Knife - Games



You know a game is great when you can put different characters in it, change the playing field around a bit, add in a new way to use magic and sell it over and over again to fans like myself. Simply put, if you need a Castlevania: Symphony Of The Night fix, this game’s for you.



Gameplay – There’s nothing really new to explain in this game that hasn’t been done before aside from the Soul Set system. When an enemy is killed, sometimes they will release their souls in the form of a glowing red ball that you absorb, gaining the ability to use that enemy’s attack or a similar one. This was put in instead of the sub-weapon system (throwing knives, holy water, cross, hand dropping bird shit, etc..) that appeared in SOTN and also the first two Castlevania games for the GBA, Harmony of Dissonance and Circle Of The Moon. It also replaced the bat/mist transformations in a way, because those abilities also pertain to the Soul Set you have on. It can get a bit annoying having to fish through the pause menu every time you want to turn into a bat or sink into the water, but for the most part it’s very effective. Changing Soul Sets are a big part of the strategy needed to succeed against some of the tougher monsters in the castle. As for everything else, it’s all there from the previous games. You get the backdash, the stomp kick, the super jump, most of the transformations, and even a few of the same weapons. The only difference is that instead of controlling Dracula’s son, you’re a foriegn exchange student named Soma. Weak. Continue reading

Doogmah’s Free Game Of The Week (1/20-1/26): Rumble Fighters

By: doogmah (some revizzles for your televizzle.)
I battled my computer and won, so here’s the new review on the game Rumble Fighters. However, i’m still losing the battle against WordPress, so you’re going to have to click another link instead of just hitting play. Weak.

Doogmah’s Free Game Of The Week (1/13-1/19): Teh Forum Game

By: doogmah (Strep throat for the lose.)

I’ve been (and still am) sick for the past few days, so what better time to try out video reviews? This free game of the week is Teh Forum Game.

WordPress is being a pain in the ass right now and won’t let me use embed, so you can view the video here

Wiikly Wiicap: Brawl Coverage 2: Lost In New York (1/14-1/18)

By: doogmah (<3’s long titles)

Before we get into the updates, i’m sure all of you know that the game has been pushed back (in The States) to March 9th. I think it’s safe to speak on behalf of the gaming community when I say: Goddamnit. It could be worse though, I could live in Europe.*
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Wiikly Wiicap: Brawl Coverage! (1/6-1/12)

By: doogmah (Still doesn’t have Super Mario Galaxy)Wiikly Wiicap
Finally, it’s almost here! After waiting through the summer and fall only to be hit with a delay, on February 10th (January 24th if I was Japanese) I know i’ll be giggling like a schoolgirl all the way to the store and back. But until then, all we have to rely on is the daily updates on smashbros.com. I decided to further the hype machine and add my two cents on all the updates in the week. A little late in the game maybe, but here goes.
Melee Stages: Part 2
Today’s update covers the second half of the Melee Stages that we’ll be seeing again in Brawl. Thse stages include Yoshi’s Island, Corneria, Onett, Brinstar and my personal favorite (lol, internet sarcasm) Rainbow Ride! All I can say besides “FUCK YES CORNERIA’S BACK I LOVE THAT STAGE YES” is that the graphics look great. This was to be expected I guess, but it’s nice to get a fresh perspective on the maps you know and love from the older series. It really helps the aging process. But aside from all that, there’s not really much else to say because we’ve all seen these stages before so enjoy the pictures.
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Doogmah’s Free Game Of The Week! (1/6-1/12): Soldat (PC)

By: doogmah (Too busy watching Conan to write a decent review)

Created By:Michal Marcinkowski
Genre:Multiplayer Contra style shooter
Where to find it: http://www.soldat.pl/download.html
Difficulty: Very easy to learn, but the difficulty really depends on who you’re playing. Bots are also customizable, giving you five options for difficulty.
System Requirements:
– A PC, a keyboard, a mouse, a brain
– 333mhz processor
– Video accelerator that can run Direct3D
– Graphics card compatible with DirectX 8.1
– 32 MB RAM
– Some free MB on disk
– Sound card
– Network card or modem (Will work without internet connection, you just can’t play online)
– Microsoft Windows 98/Me/2000/XP (No idea if it runs on Vista)
– Microsoft DirectX 8.1
Size: 28.4 MB installed

So you liked Contra back in the days of the NES/SNES. A few more years down the road, and you’ve discovered PC FPS, namely stuff like Half-Life, Quake, or Unreal Tournament. Looking for something new to play? Try Soldat. I would describe this game as an online multiplayer version of Contra or Metal Slug, except with a moving cursor controlled by your mouse… and jet packs.

After installing the game and setting up the usual configuration (control mapping, video resolution, the whole nine yards), you have a choice to play with bots or with other players on the internet. To get the full experience, I based this review on the internet play. It’s not like the gameplay is much different anyway. But before I talk about the game, let me just say this: The opening music is BAD ASS. What other way to get you pumped to blow animated sprites to bits than to use a pounding Pantera-esque opening tune to start it all off? Alright, I’ve been listening too long at this point, let’s get to the game. Continue reading