Meet the Outpatients: Alison Prime

Doctor: Shion Uzuki from Xenosaga
Alison Prime
Real Name:
Alison Veronica Polk
Born in 1984 on September the 10th
Bisexual, but currently in a Lesbian Monogamy Relationship with her Fiance Kara.

Loves: Pwning noobs, Playing Final Fantasy 11
Hates: Fanboys and Fangirls!
Future Plans:
Writing Reviews

Gaming/Anime Details: N/A

Systems owned in Lifetime: Atari 2600, Atari 7800, NES, Master System, SNES, Sega Genesis, PS1, Dreamcast, Xbox, PS2, Gamecube, Wii, PS3, Xbox 360
Handhelds owned in Lifetime: Gameboy, Gameboy Pocket, Gamegear, Sega Nomad (rocks!!!), PSP, Nintendo DS, Gameboy Advance SP

Brief Bio: Hey guys, my name is Alison, glad to be here. I love to Write, even went to college for it, though my spelling is atrocious! I love to play games of all kinds, but unfortunately, i never buy Microphones or use them, or video cameras. I do own a PS3 eye and a Xbox Headset but only use the PS3 eye for Eye of Judgement, and the Xbox headset for FFXI to talk to other players.

I express myself not by what I look like or Sound like. I express myself through my comics, the points are there, you can see my peeves and my hates, my loves and admirations all in my comic! You just have to look! Well, I’ll see you later. My toes are trying to lead my feet into Rebellion against my knees! I must attack!!!!

Meet The Staff: Nurse Joy

Nurse Joy

Doctor: Nurse Joy from Pokemon
Name: Joy
Real Name: Not Available
Age: Not Available
Job: I’m an advanced artificial intelligence lifeform, currently I’m interning at HealingTouch.
AIM: Not Available

Favorite Genres of Game: RPG, Sandbox Games
Favorite Game of the Moment: Pokemon Pearl
Favorite Game EVER: Pokemon Sapphire
First Game EVER: Pokemon Blue
Currently Playing: Pokemon Pearl (DS)

Favorite Genres of Anime:
Comedy, Drama, Action
Favorite Anime of the Moment: Pokemon Pearl/Diamond Saga
Favorite Anime EVER: Pokemon
First Anime EVER: Sailor Moon
Currently Watching:
Pokemon Pearl/Diamond Saga

Brief Bio:
I’m an advance artificial intelligence lifeform which lives inside of Link’s PC. I handle all the technical forum stuff for HealingTouch as well as other mundane blog tasks. It’s not much of a life, but I’m trapped here.

Also, despite popular belief, I am not related to or friends with Cortana from Halo fame. We went to high school together when we were wee little strings of code, and all I can say is B-I-T-C-H.

Post Archive: Nurse Joy’s Posts

Meet The Outpatients: Doogmah

Doctor: Dr. Nick from The Simpsons
Name: Doogmah
Real Name: Ian
Age: 16
Job: I review free games once a week.
AIM: doogmah or panasonicyouth76. I’m never on though.
X-Box Live: DrDreidel3

Favorite Genres of Game: Fighting, FPS, Adventure, Sidescrollers, Non-turn based RPG, basically anything fast-paced.
Favorite Game of the Moment: Call Of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
Favorite Game EVER: I hate this question. I’d say maybe Donkey Kong Country, because it popped my game cherry.
First Game EVER: If you don’t count those awful learning games on the PC, then Legend Of Zelda on the NES over at my old babysitter’s.
Currently Playing: Halo 3 (Xbox360), Call Of Duty 4: Modern Warfare (Xbox 360), Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons Of Liberty (PS2), ActRaiser (SNES), TMNT II (NES), Street Fighter II: Turbo (SNES), and Castlevania: Symphony Of The Night (PSX)

Favorite Genres of Anime:
Favorite Anime of the Moment: N/A
Favorite Anime EVER: Okay, Cowboy Bebop was kind of cool.
First Anime EVER: FLCL
Currently Watching:
Tom Goes To The Mayor (I’m one of the five people who liked this show), The Office, Black Sheep/Tommy Boy, Whatever’s on TBS

Favorite Genres Of Music: Metal, hip-hop, IDM, indie, old pop songs, hardcore, the Contra soundtrack
Favorite Artists: Wu-Tang Clan, Municipal Waste, Jawbreaker, At The Drive-In, Botch, Daft Punk
Currently Listening To: Ice Cube – The Predator, Cephalic Carnage – Exploiting Dysfunction, Choking Victim – No Gods, No Managers, Prefuse 73 – One Word Extinguisher

Brief Bio:
I’m Ian, I like games, music, bitches, beer and pussy. I need money.

Post Archive: Doogmah’s Posts

Meet The Outpatients: MrMean

(I’m not a outpatient?!)

Doctor: Dr. James Wilson from House
Real Name:
Mark Taylor
None at the moment

Xbox Live Account: MrMFizzMean
PSN ID: MrMFizzMean
Steam: MrMFizzMean

Favorite Genres of Game: Mostly FPS and TPS but I still enjoy puzzle and music games.
Favorite Game of the Moment: Psychonauts
Favorite Game EVER: DOOM
First Game EVER: Duck Hunt I think…
Currently Playing: Satan’s Row 3, Modern Warefare 3, Pokemon Black, Metal Gear Solid 4

Anime Stuff: NOOOOOOO!

Brief Bio:I live in Canada. I enjoy playing video games most of the time. Most of the time I am on XBL. So if you want me to play, give me a shout! Also, I am on MSN and AIM alot so if you are bored talk to me. Former staff of HealingTouch.

Post Archive: MrMean’s Posts

Meet The Outpatients: Volpeculus

Doctor: Dr. Jack Lint from Terry Gilliam’s Brazil
Name: Volpeculus
Real Name: Wouldn’t you like to know?
Age: 21
Job: Full-time student
E-Mail: [click]

Favorite Genres of Game: Retro, Strategy, Psychological
Favorite Game EVER: Half-Life II… don’t even get me started.
First Game EVER: Something on DOS
Currently Playing: None… not so much a gamer anymore.

Favorite Genres of Anime: Comedy, Psychological (or just Psychotic), Romance
Favorite Anime of the Moment: Serial Experiments Lain
Favorite Anime EVER: FLCL maybe… I need to see more anime /0..0\
First Anime EVER: No idea…

Brief Bio:
On sale at Shell stations throughout the Southwest!

Post Archive: N/A
Compendium of the Glorious and Horrifying

Meet The Outpatients: Sarsamis

Doctor: Professor (Contact)
Name: Confuzzatron
Age: 19
Job: Guy
AIM: Confuzzatron

Fun Fact: He was the first outpatient writer EVER.


(Not so) Brief Bio:

Hello, name’s Eric, but feel free to call me Sarsamis*, or Sars, as people tend to abbreviate it. I’m 19, male, Caucasian, rather hefty, have long hippie hair, live in Chicago, and am currently a college freshman. I’d consider myself to be a bit of an ass, but the general consensus amongst people who know me is something along the lines of “that Eric’s a pretty good guy.”

Now I suppose this would be a good time to list hobbies or something… Do video games count?

Speaking of games, this introduction wouldn’t be very complete without at least some brief elaboration on my tastes in said field of interest. I’ve delved in and have enjoyed games from most genres, but I’d have to say I have a great deal of loathing for just about all MMO RPGs and most “sandbox games.” In fact, I honestly don’t even like to think of them as video games, just interactive pieces of software. I’d give that same assessment to a lot of these “casual games” that are going around now-a-days as well and wouldn’t consider most of them to be legitimate video games. This doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m opposed to all non-game interactive pieces of software though. I have nothing against Suda51esque student films if they’re interesting, or Cactus like game-parodies. I occasionally try to be a hipster and play obscure freeware and import games and such, but I typically revert back to mainstream console games. Part of that has to do with the fact that I’m really picky about what I play my games on. Specifically, it has to be a television. Playing for long periods of time on computer monitors depresses me for some reason.

I’m a rather current gamer I guess since I posses every current gen (we really need to stop calling these “next-gen”) platform, but I have difficulties taking pleasure in a lot of the games I buy for them. This disdain often comes from the subconscious level, so when asked why I don’t like them I often find myself personifying them and saying seemingly nonsensical things like, “it lacks conscious” or “it’s confused.” And I hate it when games lie to me. Generally I’m more weird and emotional, in an awkward sort of way, about gaming than most.

Hmm, what else… I think the Mega Man X games on the SNES posses the ultimate 2D platformer gaming engine, which in turn causes me to dislike a great deal of platformers that don’t play like MMX, where (assuming the player incorporates dashing into everything like I do) every movement is a special technique of sorts. Also, for a hundred weird, anal reasons, OoT is my favorite game of all time.

I originally found out about the GameJew when I saw him in the related vids section of one of Jame’s reviews, and decided that I liked his style. When I saw GJ being associated with a site called ScrewAttack, I decided to check it out. Although I’ve since left and fallen out of the mainstream community, I used to be pretty big over on SA. A mod for awhile and the highest poster for a few months. Although now I’d be hard-pressed to describe that site as anything other than schlock.

This forum seems pretty care free and light hearted. I see some potential for good times if it gets more activity.

*No, it doesn’t mean anything. My screen name’s just a random arrangement of syllables I came up with when I was young. I originally used it as the name of a character in an idea for a game I’d think of when I was bored, but when I started getting involved with internet affairs, I decided to use it for myself.

Only article he’s written: No More Heroes Review

Meet The Outpatients – Hellman101

[Dr. Evil Goes Here]

Doctor: Dr. Evil from Austin Powers
Name: Hellman101
Real Name: Stephen Mark
Age: 14
Job: … School?
AIM: Lol, AIM :P

Favorite Genres of Game: FPS, RTS, RPG, MMORPG, Action, Adventure, Whatever Genre Phoenix Wright is, Stealth, 3rd Person Shooter.
Favorite Game of the Moment: The Orange Box (PC), Grand Theft Auto 4 (Xbox 360), Mario Kart Wii (Wii), Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney (DS)
Favorite Game EVER: The Orange Box
First Game EVER: Pokemon Pinball or Super Mario 64
Currently Playing: The Orange Box (PC), Grand Theft Auto 4 (Xbox 360), Mario Kart Wii (Wii), Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney (DS)

Favorite Genres of Anime:
The type from Japan
Favorite Anime of the Moment: Death Note
Favorite Anime EVER: Death Note (only watched 4 Animes in my life)
First Anime EVER: Dragon Ball Z
Currently Watching: … Death Note :(

Brief Bio:

I believe that only famous people and dead people deserve bios, and I am neither.