There’s No Place Like Homebrew – Legend of Princess

by Beeslo

(are we dying, grandpa?)

Man, its been forever since I last did my TNPLH review of Still Alive for the DS, but I felt it was time to dust it off and give you all a treat.

For those of you who were alive when the Legend of Zelda II first came out for the NES, you were a little disappointed and confused. It wasn’t the now classic bird’s eye viewpoint, the gameplay was more arcade like and the difficulty was ridiculous. Its not to say that as a stand alone game, it wasn’t a great game. But as a sequel, I felt it personally fell short of the original.

But let’s pretend it hadn’t been released for the NES, but instead was released for the SNES.  Avid homebrew creator, Konjak has done just that by creating a very Zelda II like game but with stunning graphics, terrific music and some of the best fast pace, arcade action since Gunstar Heroes. The game makes no hiding the fact that its a blantant rip-off of Zelda (I mean, its name is Legend of Princess), and it protects itself hilariously by giving the main character pink hair, parodying his victory stance with his sword and best of all, orchestrating a completely “original” musical score which obviously borrows certain melodies from the Zelda franchise.

Under the Knife – Millennium Actress

By OD

(Movies within a movie are quiet confusing aren’t they?)

Ah another film. From who else but Mr. Satoshi Kon? Anyway, Link recommended me this anime film *since it’s the only one we haven’t reviewed yet* and I took it open myself to watch it.

Millennium Actress was made in 2001 just a few years after Perfect Blue was released. MA is an anime film that’s a story within a story. The film follows an actress who goes through her life making movies through different periods of time. Since MA is a story within itself, it might be hard to keep up if your not paying attention.

The Bastard Gamer: Doomstravaganza Part 1

By The Bastard Gamer

(IDKFA MOTHERFUCKER!)

Doom… that’s what this episode is about. Doom was ported on a bajillion consoles so far and we’re gonna go through them with a fine tooth comb.

Under the Knife: The Lord of the Rings Conquest

By Kaiserhawk

(Mages?! FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU)

A long time ago, in a development studios far away came Star Wars: Battlefront. Battlefront was a conquest style game set within the Star Wars universe and many of the levels were based off locales from the films. Both it and its sequel were very successful and became one the top selling games under the Star Wars license. Now Pandemic Studios have opted to trade in their Lasers and Lightsabers for Swords and Sorcery. Will lightning strike thrice with the Lord of the Rings Conquest, or is it a black abomination worthy of the pits of Mordor.

Insert witty caption here

The Peter Donohue Show 1/18/09

By Mr. Death (FEELING STRONG NOOOOW! WON’T BE LONG NOOOOOW!)

Hey everyone! I’m back from my 3 week hiatus with another thrilling episode of The Peter Donohue Show. As always, if you like it, spread it like butter on bread. Or jam on bread. Or honey. Or margarine. Or…well, you get the idea.

Be A Man!

FYI: You Suck At Left 4 Dead #16

By OD

(HOLY SHIT! IT’S A NEW COMIC! EVERYONE HIDE!)

Sorry for the lack of comics people! It’s hard to make a Left 4 Dead comic when you have the characters from the game, but the wrong environments! Anyway, I’ve done my best to make this comic, and I hope you all enjoy it!

Also! DIGG SON! DIGG THIS MOTHA!

Under The Knife: Rock Band 2 (Xbox 360)

By MrMean

(Trying To Save Healing Touch from the cancer I call boredom)

Rock Band 2 was released for Xbox 360 in North America on September 14, 2008, October 19, 2008 for PS3 users and December 18, 2008 for PS2 and Wii users. Rock Band was created by Harmonix (PS3/360) and Pi Studios (PS2/Wii) and was published by MTV Games. Rock Band 2 doesn’t have to many differences from Rock Band aside from some few major and helpful differences. Rock Band 2 is rated T by the ESRB.

Under the Knife – Dead Space Downfall

By OD

(Wait what? Now there’s a movie set on a ship with killer aliens?)

So after I played and reviewed Dead Space, I just realized that they had a full feature animated film of the game’s prologue!  And I thought to myself  “I wonder if it’s any good.” And the answer is no. There has been animated films that are prologue’s to the games before. For instance Dark Fury; which stared the famous character “Riddick”. And that movie wasn’t really bad. So I had high expectations of this movie at least being enjoyable to watch. And maybe fill up some questions I asked in Dead Space. Like how most of the characters got to where they were. But enough about my thoughts, let’s just get this over with.

Dead Space Downfall *or DSD what I’m calling it from now on* is an animated film and was created by Film Roman in 2008 under the license of the EA game. The story  is based around the USG Ishimura, the planet cracker ship that took place in the game. It’s said that the film uncovers what happened exactly before Issac Clarke came aboard, but like all space ships with killer aliens, you don’t need a story for that.

The List – People I Will Miss from 2008 con’t…

by Beeslo

(he’s forgetful)

We really did lose a lot of great people in 2008. My list from my last post listed 10 people I will sorely miss and that sucker took me a week to write out. The first hurdle I faced was arranging people in numerical order from who I would miss the most. Hell, in a way, thats a pretty cold memorium. I’ll miss you…but not as much as I’ll miss #4. So honestly, forget those numbers, and forget it was called the Top Ten…because there were many more people who should have been on that list. And here is where they get their stay, and they will be terribly missed. All of them.

————————–

Roy Scheider

Awesome the Hedgehog brought this one up, and really, I feel like an ass for not including Roy in that “Top 10.” The fact is, this guy was a hero for many kids back in the 70′s and 80′s and even some in the 90′s. Whether he was fiending off a killer shark from his family and townsfolk or commanding an underwater research lab, there was a certain charm that everyone got out of Roy Schneider. It was this warm, fatherly charm that made you feel safe and that everything was going to be okay. He was an actor who wore his characters on his shoulders, and you could tell there was always a bit of him inside each of his characters.

The List – People I Will Miss from 2008

by Beeslo

(he’s a big softy)

In the year 2008, we lost many people from the Entertainment world that will sorely missed. Some were actors and some were those behind the camera. Some were old legends and some were young geniuses. Some touched your hearts in profound ways and some just brought a smile to your soul. In the end, they are gone and we would never have been the same if they hadn’t been part of our lives…

Bernie Mac

Honestly, no one really saw this one coming. When word released that the funny man had died of complications due to pneumonia, people were just stunned, myself included. At a young age of 50, Bernie Mac was finally coming into his own as a comedian and actor, and Mac was getting more roles that centered on his showmanship and attitude rather than just casting him as that funny black guy. He had some great delivery and I felt some of his most sincere work was done on the Bernie Mac Show playing himself taking care of his sister’s kids. The show was pretty unappreciated and I felt it did a pretty good job of showing Mac’s emotional range as well as his comedic timing. To give you an idea on how much I bought his performance as a impatient yet loving uncle on the show, when I heard that he died, my first thought were how his “kids” must be doing.

SUPER HAPPY FUN MOVIE TIME #19, #20, & #21: Award Season Special (Milk, The Wrestler, and Slumdog Millionaire)

By Mr. Death (He’s riding a fuzzy tractor)

Hey all! Over New Years, I was fortunate to see three of the big possible Oscar contenders. So rather than have three different articles, I decided to just condense all three articles into a SUPER-ARTICLE! UP UP AND AWAAAAAAY! Be warned, all reviews contain spoilers.

Milk is an interesting movie. After hearing about it in spades from practically every film critic out there, I figured that this would be this years big biopic. We had fantastic movies like Ray and Walk the Line, so this should follow in it’s footsteps. Well, it did not. Milk has become, to me at least, one of the year’s most overrated movies. It’s not bad, but it does not have that quality that I believe makes a real classic. But what makes it interesting is I can’t tell you why. It’s a good film in all respects, but I don’t see what makes it really special.

Under the Knife: Spider-man Web of Shadows

By Kaiserhawk

(How do I write review?)

Back when Web of Shadows was initially announced I had somewhat of high expectations of the game. It wasn’t bound to a movie license and thus could spend a longer time in the shop for extra polish and shine. That works well in theory.

Everyone's a Critic

Under the Knife – Dead Space

By OD

( Hey look! It’s another Space Ship filled with killer aliens!)

Oh hello! You just caught me exploring a space ship filled with monstrous aliens who want to tear me into two! Of course I am playing Dead Space. Dead Space is a 3rd person Survival Horror/ Action game for the PC, PS3, and Xbox 360. I chose to review the PC version because the PC is full of win. Anyway, Dead Space was created by EA and is set around a space ship that has been mysteriously taken over by an alien life form that kills off most of the crew. Blah blah blah to be honest you really don’t need much of an introduction to these kind of games. So let’s just get on with it.

Story

You are Issac Clarke, an engineer who is sent on a mission aboard the massive mining ship known as the USG Ishimura. What was suppose to be a quick in and out fix it up job, turns out to be a nightmare instead. The crew has been turned into hideous creatures, and are slaughtering all who are aboard the vessel. Now it’s up to Issac to stop this madness and save his darling wife who is aboard the ship.

If you ever watched the movie “Event Horizon”, then you probably already get the jist of the story already. Because Dead Space takes a large page from it. But really what would you expect from most horror games set in space?

Misc. Gaming – Dead Rising Chop Till You Drop Music Video

By OD

( MORE ZOMBIES! I SAID MORE DAMN IT! )

Just in case 08′ didn’t give you enough zombies or un-dead creatures to slaughter, Capcom is here to help that urge. While RE5 isn’t going to be out until around Spring, Dead Risings “Chop Till You Drop” will be coming to the Wii in February. Just so you know this Dead Rising is a re-make of the original 360 title, adding Wii controls and some extra goodies as well.  So to hype the release of the game, Capcom has gone into great lengths to make a J-Rock music video for the game. Now watch as all of Dead Rising’s characters and zombies bang their heads and beat each other sensless!

Under the Knife – Let the Right One In

by Beeslo

(Twilight ain’t got shit on this!)

Well, its nice to see that I’m not the only one who has been slacking off around here, but since its a new year, perhaps I should make some HealingTouch resolutions. So for one, I promise to write more articles with a more clear cut schedule in mind. Also, I am responsible for the maintenance of certain aspects of this site, like the Under the Knife section…oddly enough. But while I’m sure others are running here to make similar promises…let’s get to the good stuff!

So for New Year’s, my girlfriend and I decided to go to the movies. After much discussion, we decided to go see the movie about a kid who falls in love with another kid who turns out to be a vampire. The best part? The movie was not called Twilight. That’s right! There exists yet another movie about adolescent vampire love and it was absolutely amazing! Sure, one could say that my love of this movie is a little biased considering I think Twilight is highly overrated, but get this: My girlfriend (a rabid Twilight fan) loved it just as much as me and she thought it was leagues better than the movie Twilight (I’m sure she’ll still claim the Twilight book is better overall though).